Don’t Make Lemonade With Those Lemons

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Some things aren’t meant to be sweetened.

We’ve all heard: “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.”

It’s cute. Positive. Problem-solving.

But sometimes, turning pain into positivity too fast misses the point entirely.

🍋 What if the lemons are meant to stay sour?

I work with high-achievers—people who know how to push through, reframe, and move on.

But that strength often becomes a defense mechanism.

We get so good at finding the “lesson” that we bypass the very emotions that make us human.

  • Missed promotion? You call it “a sign to slow down.”
  • Breakup? “It taught me to love myself.”
  • Burnout? “A necessary breakdown.”

Maybe it’s true.

But if we don’t let ourselves feel the loss, the hurt, the grief— we end up drinking diluted emotions and calling it lemonade.

🔍 How the Enneagram Reveals Our Sweetening Reflex

If you know me, you know I love the Enneagram—a powerful system of personal and leadership development built around nine core types.

Each type shows how we tend to react when life gets uncomfortable:

  • Type 7 reframes pain so fast they skip grief entirely.
  • Type 3 spins failure into a new goal, ignoring the sting of disappointment.
  • Type 2 supports everyone else while bottling their own hurt until resentment leaks out.

What looks like resilience is often just coping.

And what feels like strength might actually be avoidance.

🧠 The Wisdom in Bitterness

Bitter moments sharpen discernment, reveal unmet needs, and surface hidden truths.

They don’t need to be spun — they need to be sat with.

When leaders rush to make lemonade:

  • They avoid taking responsibility.
  • They miss crucial self-reflection.
  • They neglect the real impact on others.

This erodes trust and weakens leadership over time.

How Sitting with Sour Makes You a Stronger Leader

By embracing discomfort—and having the courage to talk about it—you:

  1. Build Emotional Intelligence — leading with authenticity and compassion.
  2. Make Better Decisions — grounded in full reality, not escapism.
  3. Own Your Actions — strengthening your credibility and integrity.
  4. Grow Empathy — connecting deeply with your team.
  5. Drive Better Results — because people perform better for leaders who lead with heart.
  6. Develop Resilience — weathering storms with strength, not denial.

Being willing to feel and speak about what’s real builds the kind of trust that turns good leaders into extraordinary ones.

🧾 This Week’s Reflection:

Where are you trying to “make lemonade”…

when you actually need to feel the sour first?

How could sitting with it—and speaking to it—make you a more powerful, trusted, and effective leader?


Want to dive deeper?

Take the most accurate Enneagram assessment I trust:

 [Take the assessment here].

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